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Week 2 – Chicago Bears (0-1) @ Arizona Cardinals (0-1)
Strengths
- No obvious weak spots on defence, excellent linebacker corps lead by MLB Brian
Urlacher.
- Pro Bowl WR Marty Booker.
Weaknesses
- Booker and C Olin Kreutz are the only decent players on offence.
Game Plan
We had the game in the palm of our hand last week, before deciding that the
sensation was weird and freaky and that we’d be more comfortable
self-destructing in spectacular fashion. Jeff Blake wants to have a better game
this week or else – God help us all – I’m seriously going to have to think about
taking the Carpenters’ advice and opting to Send In McCown.
No? No? Sod you all, then.
Where was I? Oh, right, the game. Well, trying to rattle first-year starter Rex
Grossman looks like a good plan, particularly given that he’s only one decent
target to aim at. We need to blanket Marty Booker, watch for Anthony Thomas’
inside running and make Grossman have to throw to his other receivers to beat
us.
On offence, there are no real gaps in Chicago’s D to exploit, so we’re just
going to have to endeavour to do what we do best (power-rushing, spread field
with quick receivers) and make them worry about stopping us. Yes, that does
count as a plan.
-
The home opener, then, and Sun Devil is crammed to the rafters with thousands
of Arizonians (Arizonalings? Arizonish?), all clinging to the faint, irrational
notion that this might finally be the year that the Cardinals pull it all
together and reach the dizzying heights of being deemed “average”.
There’s a phrase for this phenomenon. It’s “the triumph of hope over decades of
painful, humiliating experience.”
And who else could we possibly be playing than Chicago, the team whose 45-7
drubbing of us at Soldier Field last season was the first in a string of 5
straight losses that dropped us waaaaay out of playoff contention. Gits.
It seems like Chicago have brought a little of home with them to Tempe, as the
captains trot out for the coin-toss amidst peals of thunder. The Bears win the
toss and receive the kick, but it doesn’t really help them as they quickly go
three and out and punt the thing back to us. Hurrah. Wasting no time, we race
into Chicago territory then come out in the 2RB/3WR set that I’ve been growing
increasingly fond of. Anquan runs a drag across from the left, R.W. McQuarters
sticking to him like glue, and Shaun McDonald sneaks out of the slot and into
the gap that Boldin has just created. Jeff Blake rolls out and pulls the
trigger, McDonald hauls it in and takes off down the sideline. Michael Green,
the Bear strong safety, has taken a good angle, though, and dives full-stretch
at the speedy receiver, punching the ball out as he flies past. Christ! McDonald
stays on his feet, however, scoops up the fumble without breaking stride and
coasts the last ten yards into the endzone, the crowd going abso-bloody-lutely
ballistic.
Lucky? Why, yes. Yes, we are. CHI 0-7 ARI
As if needing to take a breather from all that excitement, the game lapses into
a battle for field-position, with both defences stepping up to the plate. At the
start of the second quarter, Blake goes looking for an open McDonald on 3rd and
8 at the Bear 30, but underthrows the pass and gets it batted down leaving
Martin Gramatica to extend our lead with a 46-yarder. This is all going
according to plan, isn’t it? CHI 0-10 ARI
Chicago stumble to our 30 on the ensuing drive thanks to a very dodgy facemask
penalty on Dexter Jackson. Throwing caution to the wind, we go to a 4-6 and
stuff runs on consecutive plays, then get enough pressure to force an
incompletion. Paul Edinger’s 44-yard trey creeps over via the bottom foot or so
of the right-hand upright, and with five minutes left in the first half, the
Bears are on the board. CHI 3-10 ARI
They get the ball back pretty quickly, as well, Urlacher and the rest of the
defence stepping up to stop us cold. On their next drive, however, Anthony
Thomas runs into a crowd-scene and Dexter Jackson makes up for the personal-foul
he was flagged for by getting his hand in and ripping the ball loose. It flies
away to land at the feet of rookie defensive end Larry Dickerson, who scoops up
the rock and rumbles to the 16 before Grossman (!) can tackle him.
1st and 10, and Jeff Blake finds Travis Minor on a swing-pass, who has just
enough time to secure the ball before he’s hit and coughs it up. If you watch
the action carefully, there are subtle, subtle hints that the rain might just be
affecting people's ability to hang on to the ball.
Anyway, Safety Mike Brown grabs it, returns it past halfway and can someone
please try keeping possession for more than about two plays at a time? Just for
a change of pace?
The Bears are having none of that nonsense, though, handing the ball straight
back after two plays. Unfortunately, the two plays are a 27-yard gain to TE
Desmond Clark down the seam, then a strike in between two defenders to Marty
Booker to level the scores. Gah. CHI 10-10 ARI
Man, this is turning into a long five minutes. With Chicago’s defence trying to
keep an eye on Anquan and Johnno, Shaun McDonald sneaks open on consecutive
plays for 13, then 20 on an out-and-up. The two-minute warning sees us camped at
the 44, but a catch by Travis Minor then two near-picks puts us into position
for Martin Gramatica to nail his third long FG of the half, a 47-yarder to make
it CHI 10-13 ARI
We shift to the prevent defence, which never, ever works and always leaves me
wondering why I still use it. True to form, Rex Grossman performs a reasonable
impression of the Peytonator, throwing inch-perfect bombs no matter how many
defenders are jumping up and down on him at the time. Chicago go 70 yards in a
hurry, Marty bloody Booker, who I could have sworn I told my defensive
coordinator to blanket, getting open for the go-ahead score. This is getting
silly, now. CHI 17-13 ARI
You know what’s odd? With all these turnovers going around, Jeff Blake hasn’t
managed a single one yet... oh, I stand corrected. Looking to drive us into
range for a last score, Blake gets his stupid self picked off, leaving Chicago
at our 20 and in perfect position to put the boot in going into the half. But
we’re not quite done with the idiocy just yet, and looking for a swing-pass to
FB Stanley Pritchett with less than 20 seconds to play in the 2nd quarter,
Grossman instead tosses the ball straight to rookie corner Jed Bowden for his
first interception in the NFL. Bowden looks for a moment like he’s going to take
it right back 92 yards for the score, but Marty Booker chases back and drops him
at the Chicago 40. Time runs out on a mad, mad half of football, and somehow we
seem to be trailing. CHI 17-13 ARI
-
Well, on the upside, last week the Rams spotted us 11 points at halftime and
we couldn’t manage to win – maybe this radical new “lull the other lot into a
false sense of security” approach is the way forward for us?
It certainly looks like it straight after the kickoff, with our offence
performing one of those businesslike drives that my 2003 Bengals were so good at
– 12 plays, 65 yards, 4 minutes, Marcel Shipp playing the Corey Dillon role with
the crowning short-yardage smash to get us back on top. That’s how we like it.
CHI 17-20 ARI
One first down, three incompletions and a punt later, we’re motoring again.
Shipp gets us to 2nd and inches, then Brian Urlacher takes us back to 3rd and
10. Bugger. It’s Shaun McDonald to the rescue, though, as the offensive line
gives Jeff Blake all the time in the world to wait until the former Ram receiver
can shake off coverage and make the catch 18 yards downfield, then Freddie Jones
makes a nice play off the play-action, shielding the ball with his body to
prevent safety Mike Brown getting across to break up the deep pass – 32 yards to
the Bear 25. We can’t drive home the killer blow, though, and it’s up to the
player who will be known for the rest of the year as Whatsisname Gramatica to
slot his third long field-goal of the game. Uh, again. End of the 3rd quarter.
CHI 17-23 ARI
Again, the Bears can only manage one first down, and this time they’re lucky to
get that many, Dexter Jackson just failing to get his fingers beneath the ball
for a diving interception after Calvin Pace almost knocks Rex Grossman’s spleen
out through his teeth. If we can drive, grind the clock and nail a figgie to put
us two scores up, this game is practically over.
And what would be the fun in that? Jeff Blake to Brian Urlacher, 47 yard TD.
8:31 left in the game, and we’re back in that place we know best. CHI 24-23
ARI
The offence has its wheels underneath it now, though. On 3rd and inches at our
own 30, brutal run-blocking springs Shipp off the weakside tackle for 19, then
inexplicably the Chicago secondary loses track of last season’s Offensive Rookie
Of The Year on a crossing pattern, and Bryant Johnson carries us into field-goal
range. From there it’s the Marcel & Johnno Show, the big halfback’s appearance
in the Bear secondary on the end of a swing pass provoking the same sort of
reaction as Godzilla’s appearance in downtown Tokyo – skinny little fellas
shrieking and doing their level best to get the hell out of the way. Eventually
someone accidentally tackles Shipp, but only delays the inevitable for one play
before Johnno leaves his man for dead on a Z-in and snags a diving reception at
the front of the endzone. ”AIIIIIIIIEEEEE!! GODZIRRA!” screams the
Chicago defence on the deuce attempt, Marcel Shipp (for it is he) getting in
behind the fat-lads on the left side of our line and following them all the way
into the paint. 5:35 to play. CHI 24-31 ARI
It suddenly seems to dawn on Chicago’s offence that they’re in danger of getting
beaten by the Arizona Cardinals – a team who, lest we forget, they hammered by
38 points eight months ago. Downfield they fly, and, as is starting to become a
bit of a tradition, our D shows no particular inclination to try and stop them
until they get to the red-zone.
1st and 10 on the 19, then. Two minutes to play. A TD to tie it. Chicago’s
offence vs. Arizona’s defence. The resistable force meets the movable object.
We’ve consistently gotten heat with just a 4-man rush today, and thankfully keep
up the theme – Grossman feeling the rush coming and lofting a pass up toward –
who else? – Marty Booker in the front corner of the endzone. But Tay Cody’s
there, sitting back in the cover-2 zone, he sees the pass before Booker does,
can watch it all the way, makes his break on the ball, goes airborne, gets both
hands on it...
And drops it like it’s a red-hot weasel. The prat.
Not to worry. Justin Gage catches the ball short on 2nd down, and on the
following play Jed Bowden claws the ball away from Booker to set up a 4th and 2.
Out trot the Bears, 4-wide, the crowd howling as Adrian Wilson calls the
coverage, our DBs spreading out to press the receivers... and Anthony Thomas
trundles up the middle for 3 yards and the first-down.
Suckered. Damn.
At the third attempt, Grossman finds Booker for the score, and it’s all gone
very quiet as Paul Edinger slots the PAT to level the scores with just 1:20 to
play. CHI 31-31 ARI
I’m ashamed to say that for a few weak seconds I consider not trying to drive
for the winning score with so little time remaining – after all, with the
defence knowing we have to pass and being able to concentrate on bringing
pressure, Jeff Blake is almost as likely to throw a touchdown pass to a Chicago
DB as an Arizona WR...
Of course, this Martzian notion is quickly dismissed as the namby-pamby, limp-wristed
vegetarian nonsense that it so obviously is, and so out comes our offence, the
unit that’s been practically unstoppable this entire second half, who only need
to gain about 50 yards with 1:20 and all three timeouts at their disposal. Easy.
Chicago reckon the key to this is spooking Blake into screwing up, too, and
bring both inside ‘backers on first down – succeeding only in allowing big
Freddie Jones to get wide open behind them for 15 yards. The completion in the
middle of the field keeps the clock ticking, though, and we hurry to the line
and go again. Terrified of Johnno and Anquan’s big-play potential, the Bear DBs
backpedal furiously into their deep zones, which means that Boldin has just a
ton of open space as he slams on the brakes and twists back to catch the
cannon-pass that Blake has gunned out of the pocket a fraction ahead of the
Chicago pass-rush. Anquan has enough open space, in fact, that he’s got time to
turn upfield, set himself, weigh up the options and spin past the corner who’s
now desperately trying to get back into the play. Suddenly the crowd are on
their feet and Boldin is free and clear down the right sideline. A safety comes
racing across to try and head him off at the past and is beaten with a
silky-smooth cut inside then a glide back toward the pylon to beat Mike Brown to
the goal-line. Hundreds of flashbulbs explode as Anquan covers the last three
yards airbourne – a 60-yard solo effort and a magnificent way to record our
first win of the season. CHI 31-38 ARI
Except it’s not over yet – with 53 seconds still on the clock there’s every
chance that the Bears might... oh, hang on. Grossman goes deep, resident
ball-hawk David “No-Mark” Barrett gets in front of David Terrell, there’s no
chance the Bears might do anything. We’re off the mark. 1-1 on the year.
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(c) daniel
roe 2004
